Should I work or not? Many women ponder the advantages of staying home to raise their kids or working. They weigh cost effectiveness, financially helping the family, personal satisfaction, and achieving their dreams.
Over and over , I see two things missing. #1What is my motive? I'm talking about a deep probing of the heart. Is it to live for the glory of God? Am I buying into the three deep pits of the devil: the lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, or the pride of life? I know for me the last two would be my motives to work--to make a name and build something great, or to have a beautiful life. Am I looking for an identity outside of God? I think in order to work outside the home, one has to be able to answer....I'm doing this for God's glory, not for an identity boost, and not to gain more of the world.
The other missing piece is #2 the child's perspective. Rarely, do I hear moms consider if they think their child would want them to work or not, if they had a choice. What's best for the child seems like a secondary question for most women. Some have said to me that their child is extroverted and needs socialization in a daycare setting...however I wonder if that is the "best" from his/her perspective. Would they want to be away from mom and dad that long, if you asked them? I think their feelings should be taken into account in making the decision to work outside the home.
I don't think one can reach a God honoring decision without asking these questions and making sure the heart is humble and unselfish...
4 comments:
I assume, Hols, that you're talking about women who really have a choice about whether to work or not.
Regardless of whether they have to work or not, I wd hope all christian women wd work out of a motive of living for the glory of God, if they choose to.
Regardless of whether they have to or not, I think its important to think about the decision from the child's perspective. Some may choose a different type of work if they thought about it from his/her viewpoint.
My concern is that women are not examining their motives or considering their child's viewpoint in their processing.
I think too the time consumption has to be considered. It seems like you are dealing with the full time working mom, whose kids are in daycare all day. I also think you are dealing with the woman who is perhaps underwhelmed at home and is looking outwards to find satisfaction for herself.
I think Mom's point is a good one- perhaps she could change jobs but perhaps she couldn't...what then? I think this situation would only be found in the single working mother with young children.
I absolutely work for myself. It brings me a sense of satisfaction and self worth, along with money, which I really really like! But my hours are so stripped down that I have never felt like my kids were missing out. They spent more time crying because they had to leave daycare/preschool than they did crying because they had to go.
I think work outside the home is healthy for women, especially moms, but the type of job and the hours it requires MUST be heavily scrutinized. The kids (and the husband) must come before career.
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