Creation child

These are moments

2012-02-10T12:52:00.000-08:00

to be thankful for....

This is a friend's girl
Our girls are older now and a bit out of the dancing princess days, so it was surprising to me that Bethan got inspired about ballet again...I think our Tschaikovsky lesson helped!

Heidi & Redemption

2012-02-07T09:53:00.000-08:00

Another reason I love homeschooling...choosing books that drive home truths you can live by...
Bethan has been reading Heidi. Heidi is a translation and I have found that some version edit out the best theme in the book: redemption. However the "Children's Classics" version is good.

Bethan's copywork today comes from part of Heidi's conversation with the doctor. Its a lesson she learned through experience with the guidance of Grandmama:

"But if it is God Himself who has sent the trouble, what can we say to Him then?"
Heidi sat thinking for a while.
"Then we must wait," she said, "and keep on saying to ourselves, "God certainly knows of some happiness for us which He is going to bring out of the trouble, only we must have patience and not run away."

I love this kind of aerobic workout...

2012-02-06T20:11:00.001-08:00

Life Verse

2012-02-06T07:29:00.000-08:00

Having a brush with death made me reconsider what I am living for, and what my purpose is. The Lord spoke this chapter of Isaiah to me over and over when I was 18. I felt these verses contained the directional vision for my life:

2 “Enlarge the place of your tent,
stretch your tent curtains wide,
do not hold back;
lengthen your cords,
strengthen your stakes.
3 For you will spread out to the right and to the left;
your descendants will dispossess nations
and settle in their desolate cities.
13 All your children will be taught by the LORD,
and great will be their peace.
14 In righteousness you will be established:

These verses speak to me of a large family taught in His ways influencing cities and nations. "Do not hold back"??? Hmmmm...

New Siding

2012-02-05T14:35:00.000-08:00

It was so interesting to see the original design of our house and the changes made over the years. It pained me to not replace the picture windows on the front and back of the house--but we don't plan on being here much longer. I am happy to see the house match the others on the street a little better. I picked a clay color...a greenish taupe that is earthy and blends a little better than the old pink/taupe. Now get me a power washer and some dark stain and let me at that porch!!

2012-02-02T12:49:00.000-08:00

“Oh! how sweet to view the flowing
Of my Saviour’s precious blood;
With divine assurance knowing
He has made my peace with God.”

Trusting in his work on the cross, resting in his grace and love and intimate knowledge of me, hoping in the promise of our calling to a large family be it made by nature or by adoption.

Taking joy today in siding falling, new house emerging, goals being met by his hand and in his timing (Insurance paying) knowing she is coming and it will come--all will come in His timing, in His way.

Echoing this:
“For from Him and through Him and for him are all things. To Him be the glory forever! Amen.”

Bethan the Artist

2012-02-01T15:27:00.000-08:00

took this photo through a toilet paper tube!

Joy over this little boy turning 5

2012-02-01T12:19:00.000-08:00

And I was with him. It was a racing birthday party made possible thanks to Juliana who came and helped me make the cake and vac the house.

Which by the way, I think would make a great theme for the older boys' sunday school room. I could picture "race to the finish line" and shiny hubcaps on the wall...

Chad has succeeded it putting on the pressure

2012-01-31T07:11:00.000-08:00

Wanting to move our case through the embassy as fast as possible, and not get hung up in unnecessary proofing of her orphan status--Chad has succeeded in getting congressional support. We heard they got through to the Embassy Addis (to Senator Kirk's office)

"Our office is aware of the congressional interest in this case from your office and Congressman Lipinski’s office."

Yes. Its political spam, but I child's health should never be sacrificed for unnecessary paperwork.

2012-01-25T13:15:00.000-08:00

It started with snow. Shoveling the alley to get the girls to their sleepover, I started bleeding.

We took Tom out that night...no more bleeding, problem solved?

Sat. afternoon. St. Anthony's. Can I look him in the face and make this choice? I see faces. Faces of my children. I sense I should follow Dr's orders...no one says otherwise.

Under the door that says EXIT, my life is saved. Someone has exited. But when?

Home. Playing war with Abi. Feeling a war inside. Only he knows when the life exited. I played my hand--

Faith & Ectopic pregnancy

2012-01-23T19:34:00.000-08:00

I am confused about my surgery decision, so I am reading this:
"Ectopic for Discussion: A Catholic Approach to Tubal Pregnancies" .
I appreciate these Catholic moralists and theologians discussions of tough questions of faith. Just having to think this way goes against my simple black and white nature; however, in this case, it is helpful to think through my decision. The Catholics use this moral reasoning:

When a choice will likely bring about both an intended desirable effect and also an unintended, undesirable effect, the principle of double effect can be applied to evaluate the morality of the choice. The chosen act is morally licit when (a) the action itself is good, (b) the intended effect is good, and (c) the unintended, evil effect is not greater in proportion to the good effect.

Applied to my case it is a thin argument to me. Since my tube was removed, it would fall under the category of the double effect (good to remove damaged tube, good to save mom, life of child lost is bad but child's life is equal but not greater to mom), but the reason the doctor told me for removal was that it was so delicate as to make a repair difficult and a future ectopic pregnancy sure; not like the article says,"Instead, they see the tissue of the tube where the embryo is attached as compromised or infected." Re: the drug treatment or direct removal of child from tube, the double effect wd not apply because the direct attack on the fetus would be considered not good.

Another thought I am pondering is the fact that I don't know if the child was alive or dead for sure. I only know that my hormone levels showed pregnancy, and there was a 3cm egg sack visible from the ultrasound. Nick brought it up tonight when he and Lisette visited and the article addresses that too:
"There are two circumstances that make the use of any of these treatments morally acceptable. The first occurs when an ectopic pregnancy has been diagnosed, but no signs of life exist. The morality of treatment for ectopic pregnancies concerns the absolute value of human life. Conversely, there is no such moral consideration if the embryo has succumbed—there is no taking of human life (assuming a reasonable effort has been made to detect life)."
The final phrase being the key one in our case. We could have asked more questions, demanded some answers...to see if we could know. We didn't... we may or may not find out more info from the lab report. The only thing I know is that when they took the photos, blood was pooling around the fallopian tube. Was that an early indication of rupture? At any rate, I don't know, for sure.

Saved from death this weekend

2012-01-22T11:27:00.000-08:00

The surgeon told me I had an hour, a day or two max before massive internal bleeding.
It all started with unexpected bleeding Friday night and severe pain on my right side Saturday morning. The sped me from Lawndale clinic in an ambulance to St. Anthony's mid-afternoon and I was in surgery that night to treat an ectopic pregnancy.

"While most pregnancies result in the birth of a healthy baby, occasionally a pregnancy goes wrong from the start. Ectopic and molar pregnancies are examples of this. Sadly, neither ectopic nor molar pregnancies can result in the birth of a baby. And without prompt treatment, both can endanger the life of the pregnant woman."

Today I was released from the hospital. So I have been saved as a result of modern medicine twice over. First from a molar pregnancy in 2005, and now from an ectopic pregnancy. Everything was so fast, now that I'm home I am trying to process this, "neither molar or ectopic pregnancy can result in the birth of a baby" and "without prompt treatment, both can endanger the life of the pregnancy woman".

I have felt called to marriage and family ministry since I was 16. I have wanted a big family. Of late, I have accepted that which God has given--an Ethiopian child through adoption--and let go of the dream of more children by birth (after five years of infertility). And, now this and why is it that I have endured both of these? What are the chances that I would have both of these life threatening pregnancies? I don't understand. I feel that a dream killer and life saver are both at work in my life.

Thinking of stocking up for the month...

2012-01-18T13:00:00.001-08:00

Found this great calculator for meat...to find the best price per serving...use with your store flyers.

Fill the freeze, make it easy to grab and cook--

Letter N

2012-01-17T19:57:00.000-08:00

I love personalizing the kids school. Tom lined up his cars on letter N. I was thinking about having Bethan spell a word, get one nail painted, spell a word, another painted...maybe Friday. This is all new for me and the possibilities for making things fun and tailored keep opening up as I go.

These days Abi is blogging as I mentioned before 18inchdolls.net. She loves the conversational aspect...she's way into the comments section. She is also learning Amharic with me. This afternoon she quizzed me as I deboned chicken.

While we were shopping for a birthday gift yesterday, she kept seeing "Disney". I told them 1 penny for every Disney word they find IN THE HOUSE. There's no way I would do that in Target--I'd be broke. What struck me was the ramble of facts about Walt Disney that came following her discovery...things she had learned because I grabbed a stack of books on cartooning and Disney at the library. He is our "modern art" focus for the term. It has been really fun and has encouraged the kids to get back into drawing.
Bethan surprised me by reading one book instead of watching a movie. Its called "Adventures in Cartooning"

Rosebud's new blog

2012-01-16T17:08:00.001-08:00

Yes, Rosebud is geeking out with her own blog. Its a way for her to earn money that doesn't directly connect work to money (Chad's idea) and for her to practice writing for homeschool. So check out 18inchdolls.net

Thankful for the USCIS Nairobi facebook page

2012-01-11T11:30:00.000-08:00

Just found out this:
When USE does a field investigation, they usually do it for several cases at a time that represent the same region or several regions. This is why they cannot give you a timeline as to when it will be done. Many have waited more than eight weeks from notice to completion.
2 hours ago · Like
Becky Carignan Carlsen It took our field investigation almost 2 months to happen. For us it was a good thing. We went from getting sent to Nairobi, to them canceling that and clearing us instead. I hated the long wait, but it is true they seemed to be waiting for several kids to be from the same region to do the investigation on all of them together.

That means for us, to complete the field investigation may take until FEb. 28.

Morning meditation

2012-01-11T07:04:00.000-08:00

27 Why do you complain, Jacob?
Why do you say, Israel,
“My way is hidden from the LORD;
my cause is disregarded by my God”?
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

The ugly beautiful

2012-01-10T12:48:00.000-08:00

While I was in Turkey, i was struck by the mosaics. The hanging lamps and the pieced pottery spoke to me. I have doubted God's ability to fix a jacked up life. Yet I have also seen him do it. If we do this with our own hands...what would his mosaic look like--the Master? And this truth, that he IS the Master at putting broken pieces together into something beautiful...sunk deep.

all's well?

2012-01-10T11:18:00.000-08:00

Ann V says "Just for today: trust God’s will and all’s well and all’s grace." But I'm tired of having my heart stretched across an ocean. I'm tired of holding back and fending off fears of going, fears of staying. And it doesn't feel that all is well but that all is jacked up and I want my family together. I'm trying to want Jesus only, and then know the joy. Trying to be cheerful, trying to see what I can change and what I can do and do that--but I am drained.

Today, i am going to do a special time with Rosebud. I'll try to pour some oil on her wounded soul. Try to guide her to paths of joy and freedom. Thankfully, the children all agreed that she should be next. And she felt the love of her brother, another thanks. Which means they won't yell at me or complain or beg, thank you Lord. But how to fill her up when I'm drained out? There is only one filler. So a nap, a coffee and I am waiting for You.

Seeking Shiloh

2012-01-06T12:01:00.001-08:00

Hannah poured out her heart to God at Shiloh, "the place of rest," the place where the Ark rested.

"Do not consider your maidservant as a worthless woman, for I have spoken until now out of my great concern and provocation (for a child)."
1Sa 1:17 Then Eli answered and said, "Go in peace; and may the God of Israel grant your petition that you have asked of Him."
1Sa 1:18 She said, "Let your maidservant find favor in your sight." So the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad.

and at the place of rest, where she poured out her heart, where the presence of the Lord was...her face became "no longer sad"

And then her song of revelation--He can do the Impossible! She knew through experience. God had made Samuel alive within her... She reminds me:

6 “The LORD kills and makes alive;
He brings down to Sheol and raises up.

Clown boy

2012-01-05T10:08:00.000-08:00

As part of the Five in a Row (FIAR) series for K-2, I read "Clown of God"to Tbone. I didn't always like Tomie DePaolo, but I've grown to like his themes and illustrations.

Tbone surprisingly REALLY enjoyed this book. The drama of the old clown dying at the end always captivates him, "Why did he just fall down, mom?" I love how the book affirms that creativity brings glory to God without having to be "religious" in nature.

My attempt at cutting and crafting a mohawk for Tbone.

2012-01-04T07:52:00.000-08:00

Its the 11th day of Christmas!

2012-01-04T07:37:00.000-08:00

We've had fun extending Christmas and easing into the school day with this
12 Days of Christmas Lapbook. Its a fabulous review of the main truths of our faith, as well.

Dream come true...

2012-01-04T07:35:00.000-08:00

I have always wanted to sew for the girls...these antique nightgowns were so fun to do. My mom and I each sewed one. I loved doing the project with her and having her help for all my mistakes!

Kimball dinner 2nite: Kitfo!

2012-01-02T16:28:00.000-08:00

Gomen (spicy spinach), Shiro (spicy buttery chickpeas), Kitfo (spiced beef), spiced cheese. I'm getting better at the side dishes but am a little frustrated with the frozen Injera. It keeps cracking. I could make fresh, and buy Teff in Roger's Park--but its harder than crepes to make!!

jesus birthday

2011-12-28T20:12:00.000-08:00

only the best pics do i post of myself

Thanks for the espresso, mom!

Jack ate poison

2011-12-28T20:08:00.000-08:00

this week and scared us out of our minds....some green rat/mouse poison. Thank goodness, Papa Tom is a vet and only a phone call away...were hoping no long range damage.

my kids in Michigan

2011-12-28T19:45:00.000-08:00

A beautiful time with ups and downs like all normal people. The candlelight service reminded me of New Life's tradition. Mom did a great job speaking the love language of the gift to my girls hearts. And Dad K bought too this year which we loved.

a Green Christmas

2011-12-23T17:29:00.000-08:00

would make me cry as a child. But remembering this... and Nate and Amy flipping their jeep one wintry trip to Detroit made me quite contented with a bare ground showing its frozen green grass.

Chore time

2011-12-19T18:13:00.000-08:00

Post weekend mess gets a kick in the pants today.

Tbone and Goldenrod unloading the "DW" (a Mimi-ism)... love the Tigger slippers and dress up skirt.

Jesse Tree

2011-12-19T18:09:00.000-08:00

Chad painted a Jesse tree for me, but then I changed my mind about hanging the ornaments. I like it how it is. The hall is too narrow to hang things really, so this is a great solution.

When the secular becomes sacred

2011-12-16T12:50:00.000-08:00

You never know when you will turn a corner and bump into God. Oh, He has been with you all the time. But now he is confronting you. He has something to say. And when I pushed the boxes on the shelf in my search for the little black dogs, I saw this doll. And I knew. It was Him. He was saying..."I see my little orphan girl coming into your home. I have a destiny for her...I have planned and I will bring to pass."
And I am in awe.
And I snap it up...pouring out my drama to the cashier, "Have you seen this doll????" Its so amazing. We are adopting a girl--from Ethiopia--and this doll looks exactly like the guard at her orphanage, Sunny!!!!

And on the front of the doll's box it says, "Changing the world, one heart at a time."

Advent

2011-12-15T14:09:00.001-08:00

More than ever this Christmas I have felt a longing to connect with the presence of my Lord. The traditional decorating leaves me feeling dull and empty, but Jesus fills all, refreshes, satisfies. The old ways of having a happy Christmas feeling: I'm not interested in anymore. I want to drink of him and the deep of what this advent season means. There is so much to meditate on.

I've simplified. Less gifts, less shiny things, and I am pushing for more. I want more of Him. I am reading Kaiser's "The Messiah in the Old Testament". I am reading Ann Voskamp's journal and Jesse Tree devotional. I am so thankful for the guidance I find there. Who else has the radical love for Christ and the poor like she does? I look around and I don't see much radical. But she lives it. She challenges me.

And He is here. He is my peace, my light, my joy. When my desire is set on Him, there in no disappointment, no after gift downer. When he is central, there is energy to love-- to BE a blessing rather than wish, require, or expect one. I want to live in that love.

Manger straw

2011-12-14T18:48:00.000-08:00

"We’re ready for Christmas, not when we have all the gifts, but when we are ready for Christ — when we’re ready to give all of ourselves to Christ."

Today I talked with the kids about giving to Jesus on his birthday. Giving themselves away to give a present to Him. They are putting a straw in the manger below the tree when they do a good deed.

‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’

Goldenrod's a year older

2011-12-12T08:02:00.000-08:00

longing

2011-12-06T11:42:00.000-08:00

Still waiting...hoping...my heart has a gaping hole with one of MINE so far from me. I pray that God helps me make it through and I know that one day all my chicks will leave the nest and I will have to trust. He speaks to me here:

"And God, He whispers to us this best gift of all: “I am with you and will protect you
everywhere you go…. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you."" Ann V.

St. Nicholas' Day

2011-12-06T06:31:00.000-08:00

I like celebrating St. Nicholas' Day because he worshipped Jesus and he lived a life of generosity to the poor and zeal for the Lord. Persecuted under Diocletion, pastor under Constantine, he lived in an unusual and profound time in history. Our family has a special heart for Turkey, the land he was from, as well. Its a reminder to pray for that land to return to its Maker.

So the children received new Christmas books and a Nativity puzzle along with chocolate coins (like the ones Nick threw in the 3 poor girls' window)in their shoes.

Finding strength through this...

2011-12-05T12:21:00.000-08:00

Thankful for her sacrifice

2011-12-02T12:39:00.000-08:00

Getting ready for Africa, B got three shots this week and one last...poor girl is hurting.

thankful for the love here

2011-12-02T12:37:00.000-08:00

Above Rubies, please do a little more research ;-)

2011-11-28T06:39:00.001-08:00

Read In Above Rubies, that bones remineralize in lactation. Really?? This seemed an important insight for my girls and their future breastfeeding--if it were true. I want to encourage them to breastfeed. After some looking it seems the opposite is true--That whatever calcium a mother loses through pregnancy and breastfeeding from her bones, is replaced naturally by the body AFTER lactation.

"Maternal calcium loss during pregnancy and lactation is a normal part of fetal and neonatal development. During pregnancy, the woman's body physiologically compensates by increasing intestinal absorption, decreasing renal calcium loss, and reabsorbing some calcium from the maternal skeleton. During lactation, the maternal skeleton loses a small percentage of bone density mass to compensate for calcium loss in the breast milk, but it is wholly regained after weaning."

Wholly regained. Interesting!!

The article advises childbirth educators to explain this in their classes "...include content related to calcium reabsorption and bone rebuilding when breastfeeding is discussed to counter the adage, “a tooth for each child.”

Although calcium is regained...it does take time...maybe 6 mths or more to regain bone density and reabsorb. If a woman had a child a year, maybe she would lose a tooth for each child??

a precious thankgiving moment

2011-11-27T19:02:00.000-08:00

Often my brain feels split in different directions...

2011-11-15T13:02:00.000-08:00

Some of the topics we've covered in school this last week...

Doctrine, Character and Government of the Early Church
Writing our compassion child a birthday letter
Learning Amharic
Hiawatha, Heidi, Nathaniel Bowditch...
The Letter I
Cranberry Thanksgiving, New England...

Rearranging my house, making special doc's appointments, researching about the next trip to Ethiopia, making video of A...

Thanksgiving prep and Christmas prep and buying gifts

This is a busy time and somehow I need to slow down, live each moment, and experience the presence of God in it. Or else my life will be just tasks and not people.

I do love this life though. I love being my own manager of my own time, the freedom to study with my kids what I think is important (Compassion for the poor is a great school subject; they are getting exposed to language #4 up close and personal)and the adventure of the call of God.

Holly's 2020

2011-11-13T06:59:00.000-08:00

my baby

2011-11-08T11:10:00.001-08:00

for you faithy

2011-11-07T11:45:00.000-08:00

/>
Chad talked to an agency rep and a young rasta on the streets of Addis who agreed that shaving the head was a smart move--here's the new look! Although in Istanbul, beard=muslim... chad always find a way to blend :-)

to live on the edge

2011-11-05T04:27:00.000-07:00

Years ago, it was hard to let my heart release my brother into his calling--to be lost to an unknown people--to be lost to me. Having seen him in this old city where he lives...I see how important it is to send best & brightest to reach the world with the message of hope. It is not an easy task, but a great challenge. We must send our best. His easy nature, fun personality...his charisma and his goal oriented focus make him a perfect fit for the challenge.

How many ground breakers have gone before us to bring us the freedom we know today? How many sacrificed so that we could live at ease in peace? For them I am thankful--for those that go to the hard places, I am thankful. God will get the full glory from your labors, brothers and sisters.

Fashion show....

2011-10-24T12:41:00.000-07:00

Mary expressed "Trust", "He will cover me with his pinions..." I loved her work here.

Accusations

2011-10-21T12:24:00.001-07:00

"MOm I want a special time, you never take me out!" "You don't ever give me a special time!" "You never take us out!" The accusations were flying madly at me and I flew to anger as well..."Why should I take you out if you only complain!" "If you don't appreciate what I do, it makes me not feel like doing anything for you!" "I just took you out." "I just played dolls with you." OK, They were tired and so was I...
And, they wouldn't ask if they didn't expect. They wouldn't expect if all their expectations had been dashed. They hope. They haven't lost their hope. They wouldn't even think of it if I hadn't done it for them already. I have given to them, that's why they ask for more. I have given.

Has He ever done anything for thee? (Spurgeon)

Am I content? Do I appreciate all that God has done for me?

...when my purse flew off the car with $300 for an outreach in it and a Christian man found it and returned it to me?
....when God provided my dream mansion for me to marry Chad in (i complain so much about things i regret about my wedding ceremony)
...given me a man who refuses to stop growing?
....softened A's heart towards her brother this week?

Or do I just stomp and whine and accuse?

2011-10-18T16:11:00.000-07:00

I found this book through ambleside online :

MUSIC TALKS WITH CHILDREN

by
THOMAS TAPPER

A has cried "hot tears" with piano study this week, and c. 2 ministered to her...she copied a quote of his to encourage her...its the one following this one...which I like because often as parents we forget this component:

"Unless music gives true pleasure to the young it may be doubted
if it is wisely studied."

Abis quote:
"These things shalt thou find real because they make thee brave. And
the pain and the drudgery and the hot tears shall be the easier to
bear for this knowledge, which should be strong within thee as a pure
faith."

Tommy's first coach

2011-10-15T16:11:00.000-07:00

Coach Steve has been good with Tom. Tom took awhile last year to adjust to the noise of the gym; this year he runs right in and loves it.

my distribution???

2011-10-12T12:06:00.000-07:00

“God gives the world enough of what it needs. He just doesn’t distribute it.”

Ive been tossing and turning this idea in my mind...what an excellent post by Ann v. I feel her torment. On the one hand, everything in my house seems in need of improvement and repair, on the other hand, I have more than 90% of the world. What do I do?

People accuse God of not caring for the sick or the poor. But he gave us the job. We are his hands.

When waiting is hard and faith wavers.

2011-10-10T11:37:00.000-07:00

So Jackson, our mini schnauzer, ran away yesterday. I felt so embarrassed. He ran away two days ago and I shared my testimony of how God answered prayer to the whole Sunday School... and we still didn't put a tag on him. I am struggling with God's process of waiting and his silence right now in my life in general and this little event took me over the edge. I felt little faith to believe God heard and cared. He had never been gone overnight and never made it back to our house without help before. Chad and I felt sad before bed last night, Rosebud woke my up this AM in tears over it...she started making lost dog signs and just as Chad was going to call 311, he heard a barking outside. His fine tuned ear knew it was him and he called. Jackson ran across the street straight to him. And I felt humbled. God is not answering me in other areas but this little test of his love for our family...was a message to me...to hold on, keep waiting...keep believing.

My mom played on this stone fence...

2011-10-02T19:11:00.000-07:00

when she was a little girl.

Caramel corn

2011-10-01T16:59:00.000-07:00

Childhood never returns to us...but there are things that bring home back vividly...making my mom's caramel corn is like that. Takes me back to the warmth of home where mom made a big batch to take out to the farm...Laughing aunties greeted us as they poured their chili into the big ol' pot on the open fire. Bumping our way along the edge of the fields at Aunt Francie's, cousins sang, laughed and teased on hayrides in the dark. We often ended our fall get together with big ol' bonfire or huddled around the space heater in the pole barn. (Didn't someone throw a fish on that space heater and fry it so that its skeleton was emblazed upon it?)

thank you

2011-10-01T12:07:00.000-07:00

My grandfather built this stone fireplace. My mother married my father in this yard. If not for them, I would not be here. Thank you.

I see in this work of Grandpa's--a part of me. He loved to make with hands, to build. He valued enduring materials...quality (the German qualitat!!) and well done work--it stands today. I hope my work will stand, as well. Although I love to build with my hands, my work is seen in the unseen parts of my children's hearts and minds.

What a blessing

2011-09-30T19:41:00.000-07:00

Looking forward to our layover in Istanbul on the way to Addis Ababa for our court date for A. We'll meet my bro and chill Eastern style...

"Overcoming Emotions That Destroy"~ new study!

2011-09-29T12:13:00.000-07:00

"Practical Help for Those Angry Feelings That Ruin Relationships" by Chip Ingram. I joined this book study on Thursday nights...its open for anyone who would want to come to Midway New Life Community Church.

The video we are watching is quality. He talks about how anger can be a healthy emotion or an unhealthy response, "A healthy emotion that motivates us to correct attitudes, behaviors, or injustices that we perceive to be wrong" or "It can be an unhealthy and destructive emotional response to protect us from (real or perceived)hurt, frustration, or personal attack." Validating. Thought provoking. Challenging.

tbone didn't quite get it

2011-09-27T12:54:00.000-07:00

After seeing the little house that my great grandfather and grandfather built, I read this book. It looks just like it and the story my mom tells of her neighborhood is similar to the house in "The Little House"...the town grows up around what once was a country house. I read this to Tbone and instead of feeling the sadness of the growing city that the author tries to convey, Tom just got more and more excited. First there are wagons, then trucks, then highways with cars then trains, trams and underground trains... ha ha

this can steal my joy ann

2011-09-27T11:43:00.000-07:00

1. mouse in the house
2. 4 garbage bags of bread for the homeless in my kitchen
3. 1+2
4. homeschool+2=I feel claustrophobic in my kitchen

I want to open my heart to chaos in my life. Often times ministry means chaos. I don't believe God wants us to live in continual chaos, but when God has called me to...infant season, safe family baby season, and today feeding hungry bread season--its messy and busy. I like my life neat and peaceful. Ann Voskamp asked..what can steal your joy? oh all this above... but can I get it back? If I want to open my heart to the challenge of loving more, giving more and extending myself more, i need to tolerate and maintain my joy in the midst of
chaos.

Roots here...

2011-09-26T20:34:00.000-07:00

We went to see my uncle's amazing renovation of Grandma's old house...and to walk on the beautiful land. Walked next door to Uncle Dave's property and ran into my cousin Joey and his dad. So nice to feel your roots. To remember childhood romps. Its so beautiful there... We almost came home with bunnies :-)

Were in love with baby Eli anthony

2011-09-26T18:47:00.000-07:00

my sister's newest...

Help me people

2011-09-18T20:30:00.000-07:00

Where's the line between using discretion and being a liar? I think I have been trying to answer this question my whole life.

Goldenrod pokes through the gate

2011-09-17T13:06:00.000-07:00

She's standing on the fence between the junkyard garden and our yard. She calls to the neighbor girl across the way. A precious moment.

a gift

2011-09-17T13:03:00.000-07:00

End of the year basil beauty

Finally finished!

2011-09-17T13:01:00.000-07:00

"Finished" used very loosely... haha I made so many mistakes on this gutter shelf...all visible on the front :-) But I'm glad to have it on the wall stably. Its much more cozy in person than in this photo, but you get the idea. This space is narrow at the top of the stairs and is a sort of hall to the back room. I've had trouble having any furniture there, yet the wall seemed to bare. Now it serves a delightful purpose--to lure the children to read books they may not usually see or pick from the shelves.

Travel uncertainties...

2011-09-14T20:37:00.000-07:00

I've traveled overseas: Romania, Brazil, and Germany. I've been to Mexico. Why does this trip to Ethiopia not excite me? I feel so nervous about it. I've been reading the agency guidebook and there are so many rules. ugh maybe that's it.

And then there's the GI infection fear... most Ethiopians struggle with that anyways and we'll be eating hotel food. "Don't eat the salad" they say, its not washed with filtered water.

The gov't there isn't exactly stable. They put down their opposition to the latest vote. Will I somehow get stuck there?

Our agency recommended spending 110$ for a visa vs. the 20$ one you can get at their airport. What happens if we take the risk? Will I be taken advantage of?

I've seen beggars in Europe but this is a starving country. The agency over and over talks about using discretion: don't hand money to someone, give it to your guide to give to them etc. How will I handle their poverty?

Dang. I'll need some prayer for this one.

Chad's chicharron...

2011-09-12T21:02:00.000-07:00

Well the house smelled...heavy today with a warm pork fat smell. C rendered the fat of our pig this weekend. I made apple cinnamon muffins with it; which I won't do again. But maybe biscuits?

Jackson killed a baby squirrel today.

2011-09-12T20:59:00.000-07:00

Way to go Jack.

wonder of fall

2011-09-12T20:57:00.000-07:00

Glory to God... sometimes I can sink under the burden i carry for those around me... the web reminds me of God's providence: His sovereign care and control of this world.

How intricately she weaves her web, how beautifully, how timely, how effectively... it speaks of her Creator.

Personalized learning

2011-09-08T11:42:00.000-07:00

Another joy of mine....to connect all of learning to my child's personal interests. Tbone was learning about lightning..so of course, we had to go here.

What's the Big Idea?????

2011-09-08T11:34:00.000-07:00

I'm excited to help Rosebud learn something that I didn't know I was missing til college. My worst grade at Moody Bible Institute was in Inductive Bible Study. I STRUGGLED to reason from the part to the whole. Cynthia Tobias in The Way They Learn puts my problem this way, "an analytic learner may be able to relate all the facts of a story just read but may not be able to explain the theme. The analytic must consciously stretch himself to see and understand the bigger picture."
I didn't know I had this problem for so long and it affects all of life. I see my girls on both sides of this ability. It's wonderful. I have the chance to help Rosebud learn early on how to cope...how to stretch.

Will look something like this soon...

2011-09-07T16:06:00.001-07:00

http://4boys1girl-kchiolis.blogspot.com/2011/06/progression-in-transition.html

weird that she connects to amazima...a friend connected me to her a couple weeks ago.
http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/

When i read amazima blog, i wondered if i was living the right life...in the right country. ???

Room cleaning and the role of government.

2011-09-07T06:29:00.000-07:00

Rosebud, thrilled to have a piece of the room to herself says, "Since you've given me my own space, I really want to keep it clean!" Mom replies, "Yeah, when its yours, its easier to take care of it." Rosebud answers, "Except you have no one to help you clean it up!" Her joy and motivation is the reason why I'm not socialist. Private ownership has proven to increase productivity. More control in the hands of the individual stimulates the economy. Why is it when we have problems, we want to make choices to give the government more control? Putting the problem in their hands is like telling all my three kids to clean up their room. Initiative and productivity go down. Yet tell them, "Here is your corner and when its clean you can play." and some of them will rock it as fast as they can. You will always have some loafers.

First week of school

2011-09-06T11:26:00.001-07:00

Ribs in the crock pot are steamin' good thanks to "Once A Month Cooking". Mom helped me do the 9 hr cooking spree a few weeks ago. Kids are off and running with school. The pace feels good this year....the activities better suited to their personalities. Three new methods I'm trying this year:
1. Words Their Way: word sorts for learning spelling in 2nd g.
2. Dictation by Charlotte Mason: for learning grammar 4th g.
3. Apologia Science Text/wkbk. I LOVE their text...very exciting and deeply Biblical...we mummified an apple this week.

God is faithful to teach and mold and shape me each year in this challenging role as homeschool mom.

AM to PM play

2011-08-31T13:37:00.000-07:00

They played from morning to night on the dunes

2011-08-31T13:35:00.000-07:00

And quiet ones...

2011-08-31T13:32:00.001-07:00

We have outgoing ones...

2011-08-31T13:32:00.000-07:00

cousin love at Lake Huron

2011-08-31T13:30:00.000-07:00

Life

2011-08-18T12:16:00.000-07:00

Many Saturday nights this summer we have spent with Kelly and Jesus...mentoring for marriage. Sharing our experiences, our thoughts (too many at times :-))and praying for them. The kids love to see them and play a bit before bed.

chad's at it again

2011-08-17T12:01:00.000-07:00

Blessing him for The Waiting

2011-08-16T06:17:00.000-07:00

Feel so challenged by Spurgeon's devo for 8/30....I read ahead when I saw his text was "Wait on the Lord" Ps 27:14.

He says to wait in prayer, wait in faith and wait in quiet patience. Ok, trying to do that ...here's the one that jabbed my soul, "Wait in quiet patience, not rebelling because you are under affliction, but blessing your God for it."

That's a challenge but I am willing today to speak the blessing and trust my heart will come along fully on his path. Not my will, Lord, but yours be done. You are working good for us right now. Thank you.

faith

2011-08-15T12:25:00.000-07:00

I am laboring to birth faith in this waiting for Aziza. To believe that despite her sicknesses, lack of nutrition, lack of ...a family...a mommy to hold her and a daddy to make her laugh that:

“From where we stand, we can’t see whether it’s something’s good or bad. All we can see is that God’s sovereign and He is always good, working all things for good.” (Ann V.)

From my narrow view, it seems bad that she is alone in an orphanage when she could be here, cared for and loved by family. My heart aches to have her with us. But I am pressing in to where faith is.... believing in God's good work right now in this moment in her life.

hard week

2011-08-10T12:05:00.001-07:00

This week has been full of tears. First to hear of Joey's tragic death.... the tears and memories come and go. And my mind fantasizes about rescuing him. But the story is over. It can't be changed. I know he is happy with God, but I feel sad.

Then, we received pictures of Aziza, the ethiopian girl we are trying to adopt. She was sick last month. And I feel so sad that I could not comfort her. She had a boil on her head and a GI infection that both needed antibiotics....the photos show some kind of bumps on her face ..maybe traces of the skin infection that causes boils. I had to look up what a boil was. I was sad to discover that often they come from places where kids play in alot of dirt, where there is iron difficiency and a compromised immune system.

I feel so helpless. And so I have been praying and trying to lean on the one who can Help, Jesus.

grieving still

2011-08-10T11:58:00.000-07:00

This was the collaborative work that Chad and the kids did. The upper right hand corner is Joey's face... Joey and Tom are painting the left hand corner and the girls worked on the bottom.... It was by Joey and of Joey.

Super Sunday Serious Face Painting...

2011-08-01T19:40:00.000-07:00

Thank you Lord for this beauty

2011-07-28T12:17:00.000-07:00

First cutting from the junkyard garden... Bethan actually did most of the cutting...she was so excited!

Expect less, love more

2011-07-26T05:53:00.000-07:00

He took the kids and I have a quiet hour to contemplate the fresh store bought flowers on the table surrounded by bread crumbs covering the table left to right. And this man who turned 36 this week and how he loves... and the crumbs fall off the table and some things fall through the cracks. The crumbs fell from 40 egg sandwiches he made to feed hungry mouths... what of the crumbs and encrusted egg pans in the sink? Will I narrow my view to the undone, the unfinished, and the goals still left to be accomplished? Or will I count the blooms and the sandwiches and marvel in his strength? Lately, I have let go. I want to expect less, love more.

Blossom end rot

2011-07-25T09:33:00.000-07:00

I was really curious about this disease because my first cherry tomatoes have it and I had heard 3 different explanations of the cause. Was it low calcium, over watering, a virus from the planter? Anyhow...this article explained a bit more to me....

Cause

Blossom-end rot is not caused by a parasitic organism but is a physiologic disorder associated with a low concentration of calcium in the fruit. Calcium is required in relatively large concentrations for normal cell growth. When a rapidly growing fruit is deprived of necessary calcium, the tissues break down, leaving the characteristic dry, sunken lesion at the blossom end. Blossom-end rot is induced when demand for calcium exceeds supply. This may result from low calcium levels or high amounts of competitive cations in the soil, drought stress, or excessive soil moisture fluctuations which reduce uptake and movement of calcium into the plant, or rapid, vegetative growth due to excessive nitrogen fertilization.

Management

Maintain the soil pH around 6.5. Liming will supply calcium and will increase the ratio of calcium ions to other competitive ions in the soil.
Use nitrate nitrogen as the fertilizer nitrogen source. Ammoniacal nitrogen may increase blossom-end rot as excess ammonium ions reduce calcium uptake. Avoid over-fertilization as side dressings during early fruiting, especially with ammoniacal forms of nitrogen.
Avoid drought stress and wide fluctuations in soil moisture by using mulches and/or irrigation. Plants generally need about one inch of moisture per week from rain or irrigation for proper growth and development.
Foliar applications of calcium, which are often advocated, are of little value because of poor absorption and movement to fruit where it is needed.

Picnic in the ghetto

2011-07-23T12:59:00.000-07:00

Bethan and Abigail made pb&j rollups, abi bought a mexican candy and we all drank water and rice milk. We sat and I read Peter Pan until we were too hot too bear it any longer.

Beautiful from the Junkyard

2011-07-23T12:03:00.000-07:00

For Chad

Family love

2011-07-13T17:35:00.000-07:00

Ministry of Motherhood exercise

2011-07-11T13:04:00.000-07:00

This week a few questions to think about and share with your Good Morning Girls group and on our blog:

1. What resources are you using to help guide you as you train your children?

2. What are some techniques you use to train your children? What areas do you focus on?

_________________________________________________________________

The first two books here are behavioral training oriented...We used them more with 18month-4 year olds. The others are character training/heart training oriented that we have been using for our 3 year-9 year olds.

Love & Logic Magic for Early Childhood by Ray & Ray

To Train up a Child by Michael and Debi Pearl

Raising Your Spirited Child by Kurchinka

Shepherding A Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp

The Brother Offended Checklist by Doorposts (Chart for checking heart in sibling conflicts)

Wise Words fro Moms by Ginger Plowman (shepherd's press)

Hands On Character Building by Rick & Marilyn Boyer

A Child's Book of Character Building by Ron & Rebekah Coriell (family read aloud)

God's Wisdom for Little Girls by Elizabeth George (family read aloud)

***(most recent)Wisdom & the Millers by Mildren A. Martin (family read aloud)

Techniques for training......hmmm.... with toddlers we tried to follow the Pearls program of simulation and repetition with two finger smacks. Later we used a chart of consequences with timeouts for minor issues (yelling and grabbing) and spanks for disobedience/sassing. Regular praise and affirmation. Giving lots of little choices to empower children (Love & Logic method) and time limits for choice making. Love & Logic's "fun or room" method.

Other techniques we use are role playing, telling stories, defining behavior in a lesson format and with childhood examples, Scripture memorization, sharing stories of our failures/successes, repetition using specific tools like "Sharing I feels" and the "Brother Offended Checklist". Character education through read alouds such as God's wisdom for Little Girls and Wisdom and the Millers. Others methods would be giving children baby steps toward goals such as learning life skills i.e. starting small and increasing responsibility as able.

Whew.

Jeremiah's scroll & Perseverance

2011-07-08T15:35:00.001-07:00

Making these "scroll cookies" to go along with the Sunday school message I am teaching. The king cut up and burned Jeremiah's scroll thinking he could stop God's plan. J persevered, wrote the scroll AGAIN and God had his way. Wondering if we need to have a 2nd July 4th to illustrate this message...maybe burn some paper in a 13X9...hmmm...kids always love the teaching when you really go crazy, but how would Bee and Dee feel about that?

spiritual education

2011-07-04T11:15:00.000-07:00

I grew up with a pretty experienced based spiritual education. My father was disinterested in a moral traditional faith. He was looking for an experience of God that was other-worldly. His quest for the supernatural meant that I heard stories of healings, healers.. that I saw dramatic movements of the Holy Spirit among his people. Not only that but "hearing God" took on an experiential form as well. To get a prophetic word was to hear God. This was tempered by Scripture. I watched my father faithfully read his Catholic version of the Bible even as a member of a non-denominational charismatic church. On the whole, my father lived out his faith by attending meetings, serving, and leading in the local fellowship besides leading his own family to God through Bible story reading, Bible games, and family communion.

Other people have had a spiritual education that was more Scripture focused. Scripture was authoritative and applicable without a "rhema" word for that moment i.e. "If you have a problem, the Scripture has an answer." It has been helpful for my marriage and parenting to move in this direction; however, a spirituality devoid of experience is not what I'm aiming for with my children.

I want my children to reverence the Word as bread for life. Not only that, but I want them to have a deep experience of the Lord personally--his love and his power. But How? This balance is tricky. I must seek out this experiential faith for them. I must lead them into it at home, as well. I want to live love that puts skin on faith. I must show them the relevant Word. I want to habitually take them to Scripture when they have problems and show them the life giving answers.

⁸The precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandment of the Lord is pure and bright, enlightening the eyes. (Ps 19)

²⁵ But as for me I know that my Redeemer liveth, And at last he will stand up upon the earth: ²⁶ And after my skin, even this body , is destroyed, Then without my flesh shall I see God; ²⁷ Whom I, even I, shall see, on my side, And mine eyes shall behold, and not as a stranger. My heart is consumed within me. (Job 19)

Hail storm havoc

2011-07-01T12:28:00.000-07:00

Tom after he saw the garden's hail damage, "I don't like God anymore." Tomato stems broken, holes & tears in the "punkins" were a sad sight. After awhile Tom started saying things like, "I'm sure glad our house didn't break down. I'm glad our car is OK." And he noticed all the grace there in the moment. And then, we were happy to discover our FIRST JALOPENOS. The kids ran into the house to present the gift to Daddy. Yea!

I reminded the kids that God used the destruction of hail to save the Israelite people from slavery...and how he can transform the ugly to beautiful.

revisiting the why of it

2011-06-28T12:53:00.000-07:00

Amy always makes me think. This time it was about why I am schooling, "What are my goals anyways?" and working backwards from that. Easy to say; hard to do. So I interrogated Chad all the five hours home in the dark with the mosquitoes buzzing around the inside of the van and silent sleeping of our kids. What are your main goals in homeschooling? Of course, he knew. But EXPOUND on them for me...sometimes you can be too abstract! And so the result in a nutshell:
1. To disciple our children to follow Christ and in Christlike character and God honoring roles. --That they might know the Word, and have a living relationship with Christ. To shape children in their roles so they are home focused in their hearts and become men and women who nurture their families.

2. To have a love of learning and maintain their child like curiosity.

3. To gain knowledge...developing a biblical worldview--to know Him in every study.

And these are in order of priority. This part is the hard part for me, I think I have mainly been prioritizing #3. My personal goals for teaching this year are to create education that truly reflects our goals. This means creating space in the schedule for spontaneous discipleship teaching and for pursuing answers to the kids' questions. hmmmm Help me Lord.
I feel inadequate. I've made so many mistakes and spun wheels in pointless directions causing more harm than good. I have trouble letting go of my plans for spontaneous education. Help me Lord.

How our garden grew...

2011-06-25T08:13:00.000-07:00

The seemingly dead pots o dirt have sprouted and grown and now we see blooms everywhere...with promise of color to come!

Gratitude for these

2011-06-24T12:22:00.001-07:00

We discovered these pumpkin blossoms early in the morning this week. How delightful to see some color in the garden! The tomatoes, peppers and lettuce (above) have blooms, as well. I love to see the variety and awesome beautiful creation of God. In the city, I can grow weary of the sights...so I am looking hard and seeking to find the evidence of Him.